HAPPY NATIONAL SINGLE PARENT’S DAY !!
Single parenting is all I’ve known, well for the most part anyway. I had hopes and dreams that I would be co-parenting with a wonderful supportive, funny, charming, handsome, romantic husband, but then I woke up and realized nope. This is the life I got and I’m here to tell you it does not suck! I have married girlfriends who look at me like I’m the strongest person they’ve ever met and then I have my single parent girlfriends (and guy friends) who just know like I do that it is really kind of awesome. Sure it gets stressful at times, financially it can be difficult (especially when you’re not getting child support on time or at all), it can be tough to figure out which kid gets your presence at their recital or school program, because you can’t be at both. If you’re working outside of the home and your kid gets sick you’re the one that has to miss work and your pay to stay home with them. Yeah, there is a downside, but the upside? Well see for yourself:
You don’t have to fight with anyone about anything.
When you are in a marriage you have to navigate and compromise what is in line with your values versus your partner’s. This sometimes (most times) can cause conflict and who is stuck in the middle? Your kids! But when you are doing it on your own you only have to decide what you think is best. Of course when your kids say “but dad says this or mom says that” all you have to say is “that’s at dad’s (mom’s) house, this is how we do things here”. See? No argument!
There is no one to undermine your authority.
How many times in a marriage or co-parenting situation have you said no to something only to turn around and find out your partner said yes behind your back? You told junior he had to finish cleaning the bathroom before he could play his video games and then you walk in and junior and senior are on the couch together playing said video game. This is one of my favorite things about being a single parent. What I say goes!!!
Quality time is uninterrupted.
I don’t have to divide my attention between my children and my spouse. If my kids want me to play with them or watch them do something I don’t have to ignore someone else to do it. There is no one else’s feelings to consider. I don’t have to choose who is more important or put someone else in front of my children ever. They truly come first now and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
My kids get to grow up knowing how capable women are.
My kids see how truly strong I am. I’m giving them the example of an independent person that doesn’t know the meaning of the words “I can’t”. Toilet’s clogged, no problem. Garbage disposal is jammed I’ll figure it out! Closet door fell off the track, I’m on it. Flat tire, I got this. There is really nothing that I can’t figure out. And I’m proud to say that I already have proof that they are watching. My daughter is married now, and having her first child and recently I was on a road trip with her and it started raining hard and our windshield wiper started to fall off. She pulled over and took out her hair tie and was able to McGyver it on the wiper blade so we could get to where we needed to be. Proud of her! I know they are watching. And I know the two boys I’m raising will not settle for anything less than a woman who is independent and strong and will never treat women as incapable.
You get to take pride in a job well done.
In my situation my kids father is not in their life. I have my kids every weekend, not every other weekend. I am the sole provider in every sense, physical, emotional, financial. I’m it for them. So when my daughter graduated high school, I took the credit. All the credit. When I hear from my kids teachers that they are a pleasure to have in class or people say they are great kids, I take that credit! I work very hard teaching my children to be kind, compassionate, problem solvers and when anyone compliments the way that I am bringing my children up, I smile and say thank you. I take great pride in raising my children and you should too!
Being a parent is truly the best thing I’ve ever done in my life. I’m sure a lot of you would agree. To see these little faces every day growing and learning is so rewarding. And yes sometimes being a single parent is hard, but so is being a parent in general. It’s not all rainbows and unicorns that’s for sure. But, I love that my kids truly come first.
So today (and everyday really) I give it up to all the single parents out there. Being mom and dad at the same time takes skill and it comes at the price of worry and the weight of massive responsibility. Hold your head high, because those little rugrats are watching!
It gets tough sometimes, but It Doesn’t Suck to Be a Single Parent!!
Are you a single parent? What do you love about it? Is there anything you would change? I would love to hear from you!